{"id":5863,"date":"2020-10-26T22:56:02","date_gmt":"2020-10-27T02:56:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/?p=5863"},"modified":"2020-11-02T01:32:59","modified_gmt":"2020-11-02T06:32:59","slug":"the-life-changing-secret-to-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/the-life-changing-secret-to-love\/","title":{"rendered":"The Secret to Transforming Disappointing Relationships into True, Lasting Love"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"5863\" class=\"elementor elementor-5863\" data-elementor-post-type=\"post\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-431cefa0 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"431cefa0\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-6c6d7dfa\" data-id=\"6c6d7dfa\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-57410495 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"57410495\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<style>\/*! elementor - v3.20.0 - 26-03-2024 *\/\n.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-stacked .elementor-drop-cap{background-color:#69727d;color:#fff}.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-framed .elementor-drop-cap{color:#69727d;border:3px solid;background-color:transparent}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap{margin-top:8px}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap-letter{width:1em;height:1em}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap{float:left;text-align:center;line-height:1;font-size:50px}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap-letter{display:inline-block}<\/style>\t\t\t\t<h5><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Both light and shadow are the dance of love &#8211; Poet Rumi<\/span><\/h5><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We often hear about the power of love but often feel we either fall short of its potent power or believe that we are not good enough to deserve it. <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So&#8230; what is Love and why has it been the main subject of all human experience?<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are initially what seems to be two forms of love: conditional and unconditional &#8211; then we recognize there is only the power of one love&#8230; our authenticity born of living as Being itself: nondual love&#8230;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">All of us feel love as an energy that seems to pull us towards others and experience&#8230; we are conditioned from early experience that love is given and received on a conditional basis of having to somehow compromise on the truth of who we really are Self-Soul&#8230;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Based on this conditionality we chase after people and circumstances to recreate temporary feels of connection and elation followed by disappointment and a deep yearning for something more profound&#8230; unconditional love&#8230;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">All of us have experienced the chase after love and then the let down after it peaks. So what\u2019s really going on in this euphoric grasping after the glow of love and the feeling of depletion?<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The core of this cycle is the belief that love will come from others and situations. <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That somehow we will have that wow-awe feeling of the initial stages forever as long as the outer forms are perfect&#8230; <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This pattern has proven to feel empty&#8230; <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Conditional love happens when the perfect moment of our desires is met by the outer form that seems to be exactly what we want for that \u201cforever\u201d love. <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How can this be so when people and situations always change? There is no such stable space within the matrix of conditionality because it is based on impermanence&#8230; the truth is that everything is always in a state of change&#8230;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Rumi reminds us in his quote that love is unconditional and through that way of loving all of our suffering due to our separation from Self will be healed and we will experience our own fullness-wholeness, which is what real LOVE is. <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">From the space of our own wholeness&#8230;. love shines endlessly without conditions and embraces all people and all circumstances. <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Unconditional love endures&#8230; unconditional love expresses itself without expectations and hopes of reciprocity. <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In our everyday conditional love, we are in a constant state of exchanging expectations to keep love going&#8230; this creates great disappointment.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Rumi encourages us to see that all of who we are&#8230; the light (aspects of self we embrace) and the shadow (aspects we deny and suppress) are the expressions of the light of love. <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When the sun shines, the rays will die the pass through a cloudless sky or a sky full of clouds, either way, the rays are still light&#8230;\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Therefore, unconditional love is the source of all experience and therefore light and shadow are simply the expression of the Self&#8230;\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once we recognize that we are fundamentally Whole, then love will flow from within instead of waiting for it to come from the outside.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Unconditional love is synonymous with wholeness&#8230; let\u2019s all recognize our inherent goodness and let love flow and then we will experience the depths of relationships we have yearned for our entire lives.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p style=\"caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; letter-spacing: normal;\"><strong>About Alex Boianghu<\/strong><\/p><p style=\"caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; letter-spacing: normal;\"><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone\" title=\"5 Steps to Conquer Compulsions and Obsessions 1\" src=\"https:\/\/ml2cjrh6my9i.i.optimole.com\/tmozjEg-tlNnLYpU\/w:150\/h:101\/q:90\/dpr:2.0\/https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/alex-boianghu.jpg\" alt=\"Journey to Wholeness - About Alex Boianghu - Psychotherapist | Love\" width=\"610\" height=\"414\" data-opt-src=\"https:\/\/ml2cjrh6my9i.i.optimole.com\/tmozjEg-tlNnLYpU\/w:auto\/h:auto\/q:90\/https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/alex-boianghu.jpg\" data-opt-lazy-loaded=\"true\" data-opt-otimized-width=\"150\" data-opt-optimized-height=\"101\" \/>With\u00a0<em>Journey to Wholeness<\/em>, my aim is to make\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Psychotherapy\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">psychotherapy<\/a>\u00a0readily available to everyone around the world in the comfort and privacy of their homes.<\/p><p style=\"caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; letter-spacing: normal;\">From my perspective, the goal of therapy is to let go of outdated ways of living that make you feel \u201cstuck\u201d or \u201cin survival mode\u201d, so that you can live in freedom, joy and success. You can learn more about me\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/about-alex\/\">here<\/a>.<\/p><p style=\"caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; letter-spacing: normal;\">In addition to psychotherapy, I am offering a variety of courses, practices,\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/articles\/\">articles<\/a>\u00a0and\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/videos\/\">videos covering a wide range of psycho-spiritual topics<\/a>. Please feel free to get in touch with me for a\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/contact\/\">free 15-minute consultation<\/a>\u00a0in which we can address your questions and discuss a plan of action for your specific needs.<\/p><p style=\"caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; letter-spacing: normal;\">I am deeply moved to walk together on the path of healing with YOU.\u00a0\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/contact\/\">Join me<\/a>!<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Both light and shadow are the dance of love &#8211; Poet Rumi We often hear about the power of love but often feel we either fall short of its potent power or believe that we are not good enough to deserve it. So&#8230; what is Love and why has it been the main subject of [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":5866,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[67,41,63,68,69],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5863"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5863"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5863\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5866"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5863"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5863"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/journeytowholeness.health\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5863"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}